Be the Best

All my life I've lived by a certain motto (and anyone who knows me can vouch for this), it goes a little something like this: "Be the best of whatever you are". However, as a young, imperfect adolescent I misunderstood this and interpreted it to mean "Be the best" period. Now, the world is populated by approximately 6, 697, 254,041 people (I googled it) with me being the tiny little 1 at the end. What are the chances of me being the number one best? I'll let you do the math.

Although any third party observer could tell you that it was a completely delusional thought it took me a while to finally get it, but I did. Unfortunately, I "got it" in a fairly drastic way. I decided that if I couldn't be the best, I wouldn't be anything. For a good portion of my life this stopped me from doing..well...a lot.

Recently though, (like everything else in my life) my thinking has gone through some major changing. Child development experts McDevitt and Ormrod (2010) call it qualitative changes - drastic changes in the essence or underlying structure of a characteristic - I guess it mustn't be that uncommon.

So, I've added the end bit back on the motto and that's where we are now.

I've decided to start drawing again - well, in all honestly it's actually painting. I've never really been big on painting before, I mostly just do face painting and even that has been pretty average. I figure if I can dedicate even a small portion of my evenings to something useful and constructive it could only really benefit me. And this is just the beginning of it. Hopefully It'll just keep getting better and better...

ReCap

Because studying is what I'm currently investing an awfully large portion of my time and life to, it's also what a lot of the posts are going to be centered on. So be warned!

The idea to start studying first began its formation during the first couple of months of 2010. By March, Emma and I were enrolled and ready to start our first week of studying since we had finished high school back in 2008. Now, after 6 months of full-on, non-stop studying I think it's fair to say we're in the swing of things. I'm really enjoying it, granted it has it difficult moments, but this is exactly where I want to be right now and I really do have no regrets.

For the first few weeks of studying I kept a sort of study diary as I thought it might be interesting to look back at later on. It's funny how something that seems so "doomsday" at one time can seem so tame when you look back at it later on in life. Here are a couple of entries...


Week 1, March 1-6
Beginning of Week
Very excited about getting started! A little nervous, but overall feeling good. Still trying to get my head around the site (I study online for anyone who isn't aware), that's probably the most difficult thing. Got good responses to introduction - as a task you were asked to post an introduction of yourself to the rest of your study group. Emma and I study together and do all our reading together (Not anymore, this stopped being effective after a couple weeks :D). It's good because we can talk to each other and figure out the work that we don't understand.

End of Week
We just figured out that we're enrolled in two subjects instead of just one. This definitely ups the pressure. Looks like it's going to be more full-on then we thought, hope we can keep up! The weekly tasks aren't too difficult though.

End result: Feeling good!

Week 2, March 8 - 14
Missed so many days of studying due to moving. Not sure how we're going to have all our reading and tasks done. Realizing that studying means a life change. We're going to have to learn a thing or two in time management. You don't realize how much time you waste in a day until you find yourself scraping time together for essentials like exercise. I'm glad though, we need the training.

Week 4, March 22 - 28
Beginning of week
Stressing! Overwhelmed! I don't know how I'm expected to have everything done on time, it's physically impossible. I feel like I'm late every week and the work just keeps piling up. How am I going to do this? Everyone is telling me that I can do it, but my self-belief is seriously lacking right now. I want to quit but I can't bring myself to do it. I need to find a solution. I need to figure out a way to not get so stressed and not let the work get to me. There's got to be a balance and I need to find it. It can't be like this for the next 4 years.

End of Week
Handing in assignments gives you this feeling of sheer relief that I've never felt before. After all that, I feel good. I guess I've proven to myself that I really can do it.

End result: Relaxed, nervous about upcoming work. Wishing I could find a way to fit everything into the time I have.

Week 8, April 19 - 25
This is going to be fun. I'm three weeks behind, have one assignment due in for peer assessment at the end of this week and another one due in two weeks. I've been working and too busy to study for the first three days of this week, and now with two days till the end of the week the internet is down. Talk about an impossible situation! At least I know that whatever happens by the end of the week has to be Jesus because I'm screwed. I feel like either way this goes doesn't really matter. I'm not stressed and that's my achievement.

Week 9, April 26 - May 2
It's almost the end of the week and again I feel like I have no idea where the time went. They say time flies when you're having fun, I guess I must be having one heck of a good time. I've got one assignment down and one more to go. Luckily I got an extension till the end of the week. It's bloody difficult though, even with the extension its going to be a miracle if I have it done in time. I wish the assignment would get done as quickly as time seems to run away from me. But one assignment is done and I did get that extension. Gotta focus on that positive.

Week 10, May 3 - May 10
Seem to be getting things done a lot faster this week. Having a bit of trouble with computers and internet but nothing major. Started working on the assignment even though its not due till the end of next week. Don't want to be stressing like with the last ones. Got the results in from my last assignment - 6 out of 10, credit. Definitely not what I was hoping for, but we live and we learn. I guess it is teaching me to be alright with failure and to accept it as a part of life, something I desperately need to learn, me and my high expectations. Been doing a lot of things lately that I didn't think I could do or wanted to do and am actually enjoying it.

End result: So ready to take on the world; give me more!

The Trigger

I've been reading through this book called "7 Keys of Success", written by Will Edwards. The title adequately sums it up so I won't get too into it, but one of the 7 keys that he talks about is....wait for it...flexibility. After reading it I realized I needed a little some of that for myself.
I've posted the chapter here for interest sake.



Flexibility

Flexibility: the quality of being adaptable
Flexibility: a measure of the ability to respond to changes in demand

It is a sound NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) principle that to become successful, we need to notice what is working and what is not; and be prepared to change our approach in order to get what we want - that is the essence of flexibility.

A wise person once said, "If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got". That is a wonderfully true statement - in other words, if you continue doing exactly what you are now doing, then don't be surprised when you don't see any increase or change in your results.

It is the law of cause and effect in operation. The results you are now getting (effects) are the product of the causes (efforts) you have made in the past. To get greater benefits in the future, you need to change what you are doing in the present in order to produce them.

Whilst persistence is an important quality, persistence without flexibility can indeed be futile because, without some flexibility in your approach, you could end up trying to move an immovable object for the rest of your life. The willingness to constantly change what we are now doing and to also demonstrate persistence is what gets us around seemingly insurmountable obstacles.

So notice exactly what is working for you; and notice what is not. Change your approach in some way - you will need to brainstorm various approaches - then continue to observe. By continually changing your approach and finding what works and what doesn't, you will literally become unstoppable.

As an example, consider the story of Kevin Keegan, famous English footballer (soccer) and eventually manager of England. Kevin was told that he would never become a footballer because he was not talented enough, he was not strong enough and he was too small.

It would have been easy enough for him to just give up; after all these people telling him he would never make it were all professionals - surely they should know what they were talking about! What did Kevin actually do? Well there was nothing he could do about his height, so he worked on what he could do: he worked on his physique until he built a strong, powerful frame; and he worked on his basic ball skills.

After several tryouts, he was eventually signed as an apprentice for Scunthorpe United in 1967. He became a full professional 12 months later; and in 1971 moved to Liverpool where he played on the winning team in the FA Cup 1974, the European Cup 1977, the UEFA Cup 1973 and 1976 and the Football League 1973, 1976-7.

Kevin eventually became the captain of England winning 63 caps between 1972 and 1982; and he became European Footballer of the Year 1978 and 1979. He did it all by being flexible in his approach and persistent in the face of unfavourable odds.

Sometimes, I tell Kevin's story at my Workshop events; and sometimes people will say something like:
'What about all the people who tried and tried but still never made it?'

My answer is that Kevin would also have just been another statistic along with the rest of them if he had not demonstrated these qualities. Kevin was a winner; and you too can become a winner. To become a winner, you simply need to internalise these qualities.

If you really want success, in whatever field of endeavour you are pursuing, you can have it - yes you can! But you need to be prepared to work for it - to do whatever it takes. Finding out and then doing whatever it takes is the quality of flexibility.

New Beginnings

Some people - out of the selective few who had previous knowledge that this blog existed - are probably wondering, "Why the complete transformation? Why the new start?" The answer, I'm not really sure.

The truth is that it's a time of readjustment, a time of change, a time to look back at old ways of doing things and decide what still works and what just has to go. I guess you could say that's what's happening in my life right now.

I don't know what makes me think that this attempt at keeping a blog is going to succeed when all other attempts have produced...well, plainly...pathetic results. Despite that, I do feel that this time will be different but we'll have to wait and see.